Thanks Giving
Today, I‘d like to address two simple words that have the power to change your outlook: ‘thank you’. Is this phrase a simple rule for a 3-year old? Yes. Or does it have real merit at any age? Yes! ‘Thank you’ is a rule that’s appropriate whether we are 3 or 103.
Consider this: is it important to be recognized for your time and effort? If you helped someone out of a jam or gave time and effort, is it important for that deed to be recognized? And how about someone who helped you? Don’t you feel compelled to show your gratitude?
As we get older, we never outgrow the need to feel significant. A verbal approval of our action is a very powerful thing. But that’s not the best reason for ‘thank you’. The strength of gratitude goes much deeper.
We are hardwired to look for approval. The affirmation that comes from displaying gratitude makes us better. A ‘thank you’ actually initiates a chain of physiological events. When someone offers gratitude or earns our thanks, your brain releases chemicals that create a bond between that event and that person. As humans, this bridge-building leads to stronger relationships and results in a fuller, richer life. Gratitude opens the door to a deeper appreciation for each other.
In our search for balance, or homeostasis, we seek to satisfy one action with a reaction. Gratitude creates a positive debt between others: one good act gives birth to another. Positive reinforcement, by way of acknowledgment, creates a pathway in our brain that encourages us to repeat behavior that’s worthy of approval.
At work, at school, at home, a ‘thank you’ can initiate a chain of behavioral generosity, a ‘positive debt’. Think about it. What happens when you say “thank you” to another? They return a smile, a verbal response, maybe even an affirmative nod. These are all signs that people have been positively impacted by your acknowledgment.
What happens when someone offers a “thank you” for something you did? You get a rush of self-worth, you smile and perhaps you offer an acknowledgment that you’ve heard them.
Thirdly, consider what happens when you don’t get a well-earned ‘thank you’: you feel slighted, resentful, angry. Maybe you offer up a sarcastic “you’re welcome!!” to point out the obvious. Perhaps you even think less of that individual because they selfishly ignored your good deed. You certainly aren’t incentivized to repeat that same behavior for that person.
Something incredible is going on here, don’t miss it! No other animal shows gratitude and gets to celebrate its benefits. No other creature can build a pattern of behavior on positive affirmation from another. Gratitude separates us, shows us a higher purpose, builds bridges to one another. Expressing gratitude through a simple ‘thank you’ actually conveys confidence in ourselves and others. We project a positive image and feel better at the same time. It’s a win-win!
Is it really important to be paid back for our good deed? In a way, it is. ‘Thank you’ is currency for the soul.
So today, generously hand out ‘thank you’. Be quick to acknowledge someone’s assistance. Write a thank you note (don’t ever let this practice go out of style). Text a thank you to a friend or loved one who’s been there for you. Above all, thank God for all He has done just for you. It’s one of the best habits we can develop. A ‘thank you’ is worth its weight in gold. And it doesn’t cost us a thing! And by the way, I’m so thankful for you. Thanks for reading. Have a great day! Love dad
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